Nutjobbers I've Met

Merry my Beautiful Thai Teacher

Beer on Ice

Such a cute story and will definitely deserve some attention in the book, but during my 2.5 year stay in Asia, only one Asian girl caught my attention. A pure being who regularly goes to the temple – I couldn’t imagine how I could approach her, even though we would converse occasionally. But providence shined, I was coming to the end of my one year tourist visa and I had to change tact. Did some research and found a student visa to be the most viable option, and there happened to be a certified school in my very village. And soon enough I found myself signed up for 50 hours of private lessons with this wonderful person. Time I intended to apply amply by smothering her with my irresistible charm. Quickly she acknowledged me as her star student, as I picked up new, gobblygoopy sounding words in a breeze. She found herself having to award me with greater credibility than the barefoot bum she occasionally saw passing by her office, beer in hand. We talked about starting all sorts of projects, such as writing a book on teach-yourself Thai, but as a romance story and much more interesting and engaging than what is presently offered on the market. Combining our creative skills at teaching and learning, the book and projects seemed definite winners. But, alas, this conservative girl places a magnanimously greater emphasis on outside appearances than I do, and the reduced quota of daily beer consumption would be impossibly unsustainable.
Cake and facesMy time here is coming to an end and our discussions of traveling around the world together is all but a distant pipe dream, but as consolation I received this beautiful present. Is not the path to a man’s heart through his liver? One of the ways I helped her company is to teach them how to photoshop a person’s head onto a suit. Required for mundane, bureaucratic paperwork, but an attractive solution for the average tourist, who has brought only Hawaiian shorts and dreads the thought of dressing up in this tropical weather.
Don’t remember this picture taken of my face, but considering I make a goofy face on 99% of pictures taken of me, this has become my new professional image. Or at least I can see the person she would prefer to perceive me as – a respectable, benevolent and successful businessman who is impeccable about his appearance. It was a beautiful dream.

the girls
Merry (left) and her sister, Cherry.

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